so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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