Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
