My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
someone owes me an orgasm
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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