I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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