We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then he tried to convert me to islam
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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