So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
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