Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
