We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
