super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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