Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
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