I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
