that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
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