I got her a Nickelback box set.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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