Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
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