I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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