Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
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I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
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I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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