I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
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