This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Watching her eat just hurts me
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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