Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm bleeding and have questions
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize