i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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