yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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