im about as happy as oj after his trial
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I have fence marks all over my body
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Randomize