need another drink. this is the easiest way
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
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