in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
