I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
