My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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