my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
