I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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