Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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