now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
