Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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