Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
no you cant smoke seaweed
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
Randomize
