i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
