omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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