She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Randomize
