I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
