she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
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