one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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