LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
