What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Randomize
