So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
