Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
