My cat gives me a boner
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
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