I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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