I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Randomize
