god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
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