normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
