no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
