I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
This is my gift to your gina
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Randomize
