We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
