Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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