Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
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